It’s a zoo in here
Now you have a right to disagree if that's how you feel but I reckon I'm some man for one man. You'd look hard round Taronga Zoo today for a bigger legend and I looked very hard. Even the Silverback came over and shook my hand nodding in disbelief. I attribute my greatness to the fact that I'm here in pleasant form in spite of the fact that I hate the Zoo and all it stands for. Let's go look at the Chimpanzees? Grand. Let's go look at the Capybara? No problem. Humid. Packed out. Pure feckin Zen. A picture of fatherly tranquillity. Can we get a spiral potato? Certainly. How about an Ice Cream? No reason why not. I've been here a heap of times too. I know what I'm in for. But there's nothing as sad to me as looking at a Giraffe standing in a small section of Taronga Zoo. Even if he has the best view in Sydney.
Trapped. Put yourself in their shoes. The ones they're not wearing. Enclosure. Compound. Cage. Display.
You're not going to like it when Aliens do it to us. We'd all be up for slinging faeces at the back of cousin Padraig's head if we were KEPT. Stared at. Proded and bred. They'll line up and point and we'll have fake stuff around us to remind us of home and take our minds off the stress induced hair loss and Mammy sitting there twitching making Soda Bread out of dirt. Oh you laugh now but you won't be laughing come breeding time when they put you in a box with some butt ugly smiling half wit and they lower the lights and put on a Barry White record.
One moment of lightness did come when the call went up to go see the Rhinos. I thought for a second there they said Winos and you know that exhibition might just kill a few birds with one stone. Equality for one. Sauce for the goose exhibition is sauce for the gander exhibition. The animals might not feel so bad if we had a few of our own inside. Also gives them regular food a place to sleep and a weekly hose down. Can't say fairer than that. They'd be queueing to get in and there's compassion too. We care.
Anyway down with zoos. Get out amongst it and see nature. This hot close knit covid ridden mob ain't no way for us to behave. Unless they let us bring in rifles?